Wednesday, August 03, 2011

10 Best Ways to Avoid Marriage

If you are in that stage of your life where your parents want to perform their so called last duty for you called marriage and get back to honeymooning, or a stage when the "Single" or "In- a relationship" status seems more appealing than  "Married" then please read on.

10 Best Ways to avoid Marriages in India.

1. Shaving your head: This is highly recommended for women. (Those who aren't regular customers at Dr. Batra's hair fall clinic kindly refrain from such activities).

2. Wearing Braces: This is a temporary stint and can help you avoid marriage for atleast 2 years depending on how awful you appear.

3. Getting a Tatoo or piercing at a strategic location: The more strategic the location, the more easy it is to sabotage the plans of  a life long commitment.

4. To appear as someone who has renounced all forms of communication: Not recommended for those who are already in a relationship. Stay away from Facebook and other social networking sites. No one would want to marry you if you don't have at least an email account or atleast a mobile. This might make your parents a little anxious, but assure them that you are not following the foot steps of Baba Ramdev or Nithyananda and they needn't worry.

5. Faking homosexuality: This has the highest success rate when compared to any other method. If you have parents who are ready to get you married at any cost, then this might boomerang on you.

6. Quoting unrealistic demands: Tell your parents that you would want to marry someone whose name begins with an 'X'.

7. Appearing ungroomed: This is recommended only if you are extremely desperate to not get married and run out of all options. Dress up badly, forget table manners, display the gaseous outflows from your body openly( Burp loudy), scratch your head and pick you nose.

8. Feign depression: This is works only with emotional parents or partners. Warning: Will not work always.

9. Declare Bankruptcy: This should work unless you are a descendent of the Mursi Tribe in Africa.

10. Stick posters of Baba Ramdev, Bappi Lahiri, Rakhi Sawanth, Imraan Hashmi, and Lady Gaga in your room: A good enough reason for people to avoid you. 

4 comments:

Preethi said...

Louwelifulll!!!

kichinho said...

what if a guy named xavier is the guy you are looking to marry lol

neo said...

Its 4 in da morning and I do no why iam reading ur blog, but good its really well written.. keep on doing it

Kolor said...

Haha. That was funny. Though seriously, you sound like, you want to temporarily avoid marriage, but eventually get married to a knight in shining armour. Am I right ?